I was reflecting on the last 3 years of my life recently and specifically thinking about the times that I spent disconnected and isolated from others, my choice. It's what I felt like doing, I was trying to avoid relationships and any connection with most people. When I say it is what I felt like doing, what I mean is I followed that inclination because I thought it would make me feel better. Well it didn't and in fact as I look back on all that alone time, I really can't identify any way in which I was helped. I can't think of how I profited or what I gained. What I thought would do me some good, did me no good at all. Which isn't terribly uncommon, we feel an itch we obey the impulse to scratch it, even if does more harm than good. I was infected with Poison Ivy one time and it was bad, really bad. I wanted to scratch the itch really bad, but it only made it worse and would cause it to spread. I had to resist the urge to do what felt like the right thing to do. I think there are many things like that in life, things that call upon us to obey and impulse, take an action, in the name of resolving something, when there are times, many times when the right approach to something is the exact opposite of what we feel is the right thing to do.
That's how it was with my isolation, it felt so right, I desired to be alone, couldn't wait, yet in the end it didn't help me at all. Obviously I'm not speaking here of withdrawing to contemplate, to draw near to God, God was there, but I wasn't drawing near.
I don't really have anything profound to say about this, in fact what I am experiencing now isn't any kind of revelation, but when I contrast the benefit I am receiving from being connected and engaged, over and against the isolation, there is no doubt that being connected is the way to go.
What we are engaged in and who we are engaged with is important as well. I am engaged in redeeming relationships with others and seeking in what ever little ways I can to sow into the Kingdom of God. I keep my eyes open and try and be alert as to what the Father is doing and any ways I can align myself with this. From all of this I am replenished and being healed and drawn forward.
Monday, April 23, 2007
When is a friend a friend?
When is a friend a friend?
I had someone tell me recently about a revelation he came to regarding a 'friend' of hers. I know this person quite well and I knew who she was talking to me about. It totally suprised me when she said you know I just came to realize that 'Jane' -not her real name- really isn't my friend. Although suprised I felt like I knew what she was saying, I also didn't think it was my place to question this 'discovery'.
When I say I think I knew what she was saying, it was because over the years I have come to realize the same thing. That there are many people who say they are your friend, they would say that to you and would say that to others, but their behavior contridicts this claim. We all go through times when our friendships are closer than at other times, but I guess the question to ask is what is the relationship like in times of trouble? Someone told me when I began experiencing difficulties in my life, that I would find out who my friends are and they were right. The person who told me that in fact has turned out to be a wonderful and available friend. The truth is I don't see him much and we can go for long periods without communicating, but when I needed him most he was there and if I needed him now he would be there no doubt about it.
This has actually been a wonderful discovery. It's not that some of the people that I would have thought were my friends aren't nice people or even good people. More than likely they are, they just aren't real friends. And that is okay, you can only have some many really close relationships, so there is no use fooling yourself and spending energy on relationships that are based on pretense. No one needs that.
I have also discovered and realize more each day that the people that I am the most concerned about, in terms of there opinion of me, are the six people in the picture on my myspace home page. I am happy for the friendships and there are more than I could ever hope for, but the indespensible relationships are with my six children and my two grand daughters.
I had someone tell me recently about a revelation he came to regarding a 'friend' of hers. I know this person quite well and I knew who she was talking to me about. It totally suprised me when she said you know I just came to realize that 'Jane' -not her real name- really isn't my friend. Although suprised I felt like I knew what she was saying, I also didn't think it was my place to question this 'discovery'.
When I say I think I knew what she was saying, it was because over the years I have come to realize the same thing. That there are many people who say they are your friend, they would say that to you and would say that to others, but their behavior contridicts this claim. We all go through times when our friendships are closer than at other times, but I guess the question to ask is what is the relationship like in times of trouble? Someone told me when I began experiencing difficulties in my life, that I would find out who my friends are and they were right. The person who told me that in fact has turned out to be a wonderful and available friend. The truth is I don't see him much and we can go for long periods without communicating, but when I needed him most he was there and if I needed him now he would be there no doubt about it.
This has actually been a wonderful discovery. It's not that some of the people that I would have thought were my friends aren't nice people or even good people. More than likely they are, they just aren't real friends. And that is okay, you can only have some many really close relationships, so there is no use fooling yourself and spending energy on relationships that are based on pretense. No one needs that.
I have also discovered and realize more each day that the people that I am the most concerned about, in terms of there opinion of me, are the six people in the picture on my myspace home page. I am happy for the friendships and there are more than I could ever hope for, but the indespensible relationships are with my six children and my two grand daughters.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Real men don’t like worship!
I recently read an article published in a periodical of a well known Christian college that blamed the decline in attendance for men in church to the worship. Specifically worship that is too feminine or intimate for men. The article was written by a woman, I don’t know whether that is here nor there, but it is interesting that a woman came to the conclusion that intimate and personal worship is hindering men from connecting with the church.
The article specifically pointed to songs like Breathe and songs like Draw Me Close To You. Both are very popular songs in the church today, with at last count Breathe being recorded on over 100 projects, one of the best selling of these is Michael W Smiths rendition, who happens to be a man.
Let’s look at the lyric to Breathe and see if there is something inherently feminine about it.
Breathe
Maria Barnett
This is the air I breathe; this is the air I breathe
Your Holy presence, living in me
And I am desperate for you
And I’m lost without you
This is my daily bread, this is my daily bread
Your very word living in me
Not to exegete the song like you would scripture, but I will use scripture to support the song.
When I read the words ‘this is the air I breathe’, the first thing that comes to mind is ‘In Him will live and move and have our being’ (Acts 17:28)
Is a statement that describes the truth about our relationship with God, that we owe him our very existence, feminine? Or is it simply a very direct and intimate, maybe too intimate?
The chorus of the song is very simple and reminds me of the some of the writings of King David, who I’m thinking was kind of a manly man.
Psalm 42
1. As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?
First of all I would recommend that you read the rest of this Psalm, it is so emotional, personal and so intimate. And that is what I think we are dealing with here, not that ‘worship is feminine’ but for some it is too intimate and therefore uncomfortable, therefore we should beef it up? The article actually suggested that we need more songs like ‘Onward Christian Soldiers’, nothing like bringing up images of the Crusades.
This Psalm of David’s is clear declaration of David’s desperate need and longing for God. Are we going to dismiss David as being to expressive, too intimate, find our selves repulsed by his passion, like his wife Michal did when he danced naked before the Lord in front of the people! In answering Michal’s rebuke David proclaimed ‘I will become more undignified than this.’ Okay I admit, I would generally find myself aligning with Michal and would have been exceedingly uncomfortable with David’s ‘worship style’, but the question in worship is not ‘what makes me comfortable’, the question is ‘What does God require?’ Worship that is honest, open, passionate and deeply relational?
The last stanza of the song is pretty clear, referring to Jesus being our ‘daily bread’ ‘your very word, living in me’. Need I say more?
What I think we have expressed in this song and songs like Draw Me Close to you, are modern day Psalms, people penning the thoughts, feelings and emotions that they have when they reflect on God and His splendor, His love, mercy and grace. Are we going to argue that men need this sort of expression less than women? Are we going to say that it’s okay to express emotion without restraint at a sporting event, but when we are dealing with the most profound truths in the universe we need to reel it in? I could go on but I’m probably over my space limitations already. Maybe next month?
Real men don’t like worship! NOT!!
I recently read an article published in a periodical of a well known Christian college that blamed the decline in attendance for men in church to the worship. Specifically worship that is too feminine or intimate for men. The article was written by a woman, I don’t know whether that is here nor there, but it is interesting that a woman came to the conclusion that intimate and personal worship is hindering men from connecting with the church.
The article specifically pointed to songs like Breathe and songs like Draw Me Close To You. Both are very popular songs in the church today, with at last count Breathe being recorded on over 100 projects, one of the best selling of these is Michael W Smiths rendition, who happens to be a man.
Let’s look at the lyric to Breathe and see if there is something inherently feminine about it.
Breathe
Maria Barnett
This is the air I breathe; this is the air I breathe
Your Holy presence, living in me
And I am desperate for you
And I’m lost without you
This is my daily bread, this is my daily bread
Your very word living in me
Not to exegete the song like you would scripture, but I will use scripture to support the song.
When I read the words ‘this is the air I breathe’, the first thing that comes to mind is ‘In Him will live and move and have our being’ (Acts 17:28)
Is a statement that describes the truth about our relationship with God, that we owe him our very existence, feminine? Or is it simply a very direct and intimate, maybe too intimate?
The chorus of the song is very simple and reminds me of the some of the writings of King David, who I’m thinking was kind of a manly man.
Psalm 42
1. As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?
First of all I would recommend that you read the rest of this Psalm, it is so emotional, personal and so intimate. And that is what I think we are dealing with here, not that ‘worship is feminine’ but for some it is too intimate and therefore uncomfortable, therefore we should beef it up? The article actually suggested that we need more songs like ‘Onward Christian Soldiers’, nothing like bringing up images of the Crusades.
This Psalm of David’s is clear declaration of David’s desperate need and longing for God. Are we going to dismiss David as being to expressive, too intimate, find our selves repulsed by his passion, like his wife Michal did when he danced naked before the Lord in front of the people! In answering Michal’s rebuke David proclaimed ‘I will become more undignified than this.’ Okay I admit, I would generally find myself aligning with Michal and would have been exceedingly uncomfortable with David’s ‘worship style’, but the question in worship is not ‘what makes me comfortable’, the question is ‘What does God require?’ Worship that is honest, open, passionate and deeply relational?
The last stanza of the song is pretty clear, referring to Jesus being our ‘daily bread’ ‘your very word, living in me’. Need I say more?
What I think we have expressed in this song and songs like Draw Me Close to you, are modern day Psalms, people penning the thoughts, feelings and emotions that they have when they reflect on God and His splendor, His love, mercy and grace. Are we going to argue that men need this sort of expression less than women? Are we going to say that it’s okay to express emotion without restraint at a sporting event, but when we are dealing with the most profound truths in the universe we need to reel it in? I could go on but I’m probably over my space limitations already. Maybe next month?
Real men don’t like worship! NOT!!
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